His Song
by angelbliss78
Summary: Sometimes we should have a little more faith, believe a little longer. Serena & Darien Alt Reality. R&R.


First and foremost, I would like to thank everyone who's reviewed, emailed or  
  
commented for Cup of Coffee :)   
  
This piece is quite rushed. It's a spur of the moment piece and I'm not too  
  
proud of it. I hope it's not too confusing. It's based on the song "His Song"  
  
by Stina Nordenstam.  
  
Standard Disclaimer Applies.  
  
Now onward with the story! Remember, all feedback is greatly appreciated.  
  
Another song-fic.   
  
------------------------  
  
HIS SONG - ANGEL BLISS (G)  
  
angelbliss78@hotmail.com  
  
... there she goes   
  
Waiting for her love   
  
------------------------  
  
They all know her, she's a regular sight of this cafe. They all watch her, wait  
  
with her. They all look up when the bell chimes with her. They all feel her  
  
pain, her sorrow, her happiness. They know her. Everyone knows her. She's  
  
the girl who waits.  
  
------------------------  
  
There she goes   
  
Waiting for her love   
  
There she goes waiting for the big surprise   
  
That'll change her world   
  
That'll change her world   
  
That'll change her world   
  
That'll change my world   
  
------------------------  
  
Everyday I sit here. I sit here and wait patiently for him to appear. Everyday I  
  
sit in this booth, hoping and praying that today he will pass by. Everyday I'm greeted  
  
by the familiar faces of the regulars, the waiters and waitresses as I sit patiently   
  
in booth number five, quietly drumming my fingers along the benchtop. Infact, I'm   
  
here so often, I'm even on first name terms with the manager for god's sake! Don't  
  
ask me why. Don't ask me how. I can't explain... It's as though some invisible force  
  
pulls me here, back to this spot daily, and as always, it's exactly at 4:06pm sharp.  
  
On the dot, and make no mistakes. Yep, It's always at this time exactly everyday  
  
that I need to be sitting here and waiting. Waiting, because somehow, I have this   
  
crazy gut instinct telling me that by waiting something will happen. That by waiting,  
  
I will be shown some secret door that will forever change my life. And for some  
  
bizarre reason, I know today is the day. Today is the day that that something I   
  
have been ever so patiently waiting for will arrive. Today is the day that I will open  
  
mystery door number one and unlock it's secret. Today is the day he will show up.   
  
------------------------  
  
I know that I can't have you   
  
I know that you will never be mine   
  
I know that and that's why I choose you   
  
Cause this is real life ...   
  
------------------------  
  
They all know her, knew of her, who wouldn't if you'd had spent two entire years gazing  
  
out of the same booth day in day out just waiting. But of course they don't see her  
  
anymore. No, she never returned after that day 'he' arrived. No more is the young girl  
  
whom had once quietly hidden herself in the corner, patiently awaiting her gift, her suprise.  
  
Her promised return for all the countless hours she had spent in that particular booth.  
  
And yet she's back today. exactly Fifteen months, and Eighteen days since she last sat in  
  
the booth. And she stares out the window, into the busy street as she once did. It had all   
  
seemed too surreal at first, as though everything had been directly lifted out of the pages of  
  
a children's fairytale book. Except then again, she wasn't exactly your idea of your damsel  
  
in distress, but nonetheless, prince charming _had_ come strolling in one particular Autumn  
  
day and just swept her off her feet. Just like that. And it seemed as though that was the last  
  
that anyone from that quaint little cafe would ever hear of her. I mean, Of course there were  
  
the occasional odd glimpses of that young girl's face passing by the shop front, full of  
  
happiness and fulfillment which could only come as the returning gesture of one whom was  
  
loved.  
  
So the question stuck on our minds - Why was she back here, back to the start?   
  
It seemed that the illusion of a fairytaled world which she had created for all of us had ceased  
  
to exist at the exact moment she stepped through the doors today. Somehow, the magic she  
  
had once weaved as she waited here previously had died in her absence. Her youth and  
  
innocence was gone, only to be replaced by a more mature and grieving aura.  
  
------------------------  
  
See how I'm smiling   
  
Well you should be surprised cause I   
  
Used to get sad just by talking about him   
  
It's not that I forgot him   
  
Tonight he was here with me saying   
  
He'd changed his mind he decided to stay   
  
------------------------  
  
I smile as I push the bobbing marshmallows down into the steaming cocoa mix. Marshmallow  
  
influenced memories flood through my mind. I can't help but smile, It's an odd sensation  
  
I must admit. It feels as though it's been almost a life-time since I had last felt the tugging  
  
of my cheeks. But as I look up at the old clock on the wall, I see the date. It's already been   
  
Eleven months and Eight days since you've been gone. I smile again at this odd thought,   
  
you would be suprised at how I'm surviving. Yes, it has been a long time. Far too long to  
  
still hold on. I no longer feel the urge to reminisce and relive the moments we shared,  
  
to tell stories which therefore in turn would end up hurting me. No.. somehow it's different  
  
today. I woke up and suddenly the pain was all gone. The memories of what I have lost had faded.   
  
No, I could never forget him. Forget who he was, what he meant to me, the timeless moments  
  
we shared. It's nothing along those lines. It's just that there's a feeling tugging at my heart's strings,  
  
telling me today will be a better day, a different day. Today is the day I forget the pain and rebuild  
  
myself. Today he wants me back. It's in the atmosphere, it's in the very air we breathe. I can  
  
feel it.  
  
------------------------  
  
It's a dream   
  
There's no need to tell me so   
  
It's a dream   
  
Don't you think I know   
  
But I just never noticed   
  
That it could be this close   
  
From being dreaming to being alive   
  
From having nothing to having it all   
  
From being in love to being poor   
  
------------------------  
  
She enters, face full of life today. The room immediately lights up. There's something different  
  
about her today, we can all feel it. We can see it, breathe it, feel it pulsing through our veins.  
  
Today she's smiling again, today is different to every one of the other days since she has  
  
returned. Today is as though she is walking back in her dreams, right where she belongs.  
  
Today she gives us a fresh breath of life.   
  
But who would ever know until a later day, not even herself that she would spend another large  
  
portion of her time walking, living and breathing a dream world. Retracing her steps and waiting  
  
all over again. Who would ever know watching her at this moment that her dreams were what  
  
sustained her, that gave her this new lease of life. That this dream was so real, so honest in her  
  
eyes that the thin line between reality and fantasy ceased to exist to her. Her world was immune  
  
to all pain and heartbreak. She was once again the naive child that sat in this exact booth over  
  
a year ago. She was so numb and desperate to believe that she lapsed back into her youth.  
  
------------------------  
  
I skip that lipstick   
  
I don't care what I wear today   
  
My thoughts are with him   
  
When I walk out in the street   
  
People were staring   
  
Then I felt my face was wet   
  
I didn't notice I'd started to cry   
  
------------------------  
  
I never was a very good morning person. With or without him. The awful dread of waking up  
  
and seeing yourself at its worst isn't exactly my idea of inviting. As I reluctantly leave  
  
the warmth and comfort of my bed, the mirror greets me with an image of my tousled hair  
  
and sleep covered eyes. Nothing has changed, everything is still the same. Everything  
  
except the fact that I can still feel my heart being tugged at, experiencing a sensation  
  
that you could only ignite from me. I'm one step closer to finding you again - the birds are  
  
singing it through the warm spring breeze.   
  
My urgency to set off and reach my usual destination to await your arrival has allowed me   
  
to skip my routine make-up, to ignore the careful selection of what to wear. I carelessly toss  
  
on a shirt and a pair of jeans, knotting up my hair then running out of the house. Who cares  
  
how I look like? There's no one to impress when my thoughts are only with you.   
  
Lost in thought, I helplessly lapse back in time and despite my happiness at the thought of  
  
finding you again, my mind replays the pain, the agony which I have managed to bury deep  
  
down inside. The questions suddenly start to flood, the many "How Comes?" and the ever  
  
so popular "What If's?". Unbeknownst to me, but ever so blatantly obvious to the rest of the  
  
world, my unhappiness which I'd managed to hide so carefully began to show it's cracks   
  
on my perfect porcelain face. He didn't love me... He wasn't coming back. I had been living  
  
a dream trying to ease my own pain now that this pain had become so unbearable. I had   
  
believed he wanted to come back to make it all better. The feelings in my heart were all a  
  
charade to give me one final dosage of the love and happiness he could only give me, and  
  
a final blast of immense pain which I could only feel once because I could love no other like  
  
I had loved him. Reality was with me once again, as I felt the single solitary tear trickle  
  
down my face.  
  
------------------------  
  
I'm through with traveling   
  
I now know what I was after   
  
I stay right here now I've found   
  
What I searched for   
  
I know he doesn't love me   
  
No he doesn't care much   
  
Don't seem to stop him from killing me slowly   
  
------------------------  
  
The number of her visits slowly began to dwindle as the days passed. After the day she   
  
showed up with tear stains etched on her milky complexion, her happiness finally  
  
became obvious to us that it was all a charade. But the question was to fool who? Now that it  
  
was exposed to the world, surely there was no one else to fool but herself. And even that  
  
became a wary bet.   
  
She doesn't wait anymore. The few visits we recieve are now brief, It's as though she  
  
suddenly became aware of the reason why she had sat there, patiently awaiting so many  
  
times as she had done in the past. Her search for closure has finally come to an end, a sad  
  
sight to behold - to watch the fire in a dreamer's passionate eyes die out. To see how those  
  
who have truly ever loved close the chapters of their travels and slowly fade into a memory.  
  
To see them slowly die into a nobody.  
  
------------------------  
  
A dream   
  
There's no need to tell me so   
  
Its a dream   
  
Don't you think I know   
  
------------------------  
  
I finish my drink. I won't be back for a while. The dream is over, no one needs to tell me,  
  
I can see it myself. I see it every morning in my eyes when I wake up. I see it in my  
  
reflection on the passing of shop windows. Why do I come back here? It's merely all an  
  
escape away from reality - to return to the days of wishinful thinking and dreaming. To be  
  
someone I can never be again. It's nice to pretend, forget all the pain. It's all a dream now.  
  
Just because he doesn't care anymore.. that doesn't stop my loss from killing me slowly.  
  
It's only my wishful thinking I have here, I know it all too well.   
  
------------------------  
  
But I just never noticed   
  
That it could be this close   
  
From being dreaming to being alive   
  
From having nothing to having it all   
  
From being in love to being poor   
  
------------------------  
  
The bells chime softly as she leaves the building. Although it's all a charade, it's hard to  
  
believe it when you are looking directly in her eyes, to think that she still doesn't believe.  
  
You simply can't see the thin line between reality and dreams when you're looking into  
  
the eyes of one who's love is so strong that they can still believe.   
  
The soft bells chime again as I look up from cleaning her table.   
  
"Excuse me, but.."  
  
He's here, and looking for her.  
  
"No, Sorry she just left. But you might still catch up with her."  
  
angelbliss78@hotmail.com   
  
24 August 2003 


End file.
